Let Your Elbows Do The Talking!

Lady boss and I were discussing about stretching. She turned out to be more flexible than me, since she does yoga.

Me: Fine! I give up! You’re more flexible than me!

Lady Boss: Woohoo!

Me: But….

Lady Boss: What?

Me: Can you lick your elbows?

Lady Boss: What?

Me: Can you lick your elbows?

Lady Boss: I dunno… Lemme try….

*Tries licking her elbows*

*Me and WB are ROLF-ing*

WB: I can’t believe you fell for that… No one can lick their elbows!

Lady Boss: What? What cheap antics!

Me: That’s nothing, you should walk upto busty women in bars and ask them if they could touch elbows behind their backs!

Lady Boss: Wow… Really? So cheap!

Me: People fall for it all the time!

Lady Boss: No way! Women aren’t that dumb. They know when they are being taken for a ride!

Me: They fall for it, ALL THE TIME! Here, I’ll show you!

*Call out to a female colleague*

Chick #1: Yeah?

Me: Can you make your elbows touch behind your back?

Chick #1: Let me try!

*She goes on for about two – three minutes*

Lady Boss: Oh god! What are you doing?

Chick #1: Trying to make my elbows touch each other behind my back!

Lady Boss: These guys are doing it so that they can see your boobs!

Chick #1: Huh? What? Damn!

*Me and WB are ROLF-ing even more*

Me: See, I told you, chicks fall for it.

Lady Boss: That was a fluke!

Me: Fine… I’ll prove it!

*Call out another female colleague from a different room*

Chick #2: What?

Me: Can you make your elbows touch behind your back?

Chick #2: Let me try!

*She does the same thing*

Chick #2: Oh wait! You guys are so cheap! I know what you’re trying to do!

*Even more ROLF-ing*

Chick #1: Atleast you figured it out! I entertained them for about five minutes without even realizing!

Lady Boss: Fine! You guys made your point! Cheapskates!

Me: Woohoo!


Spit Or Swallow!

Flu season was going on in office. Everyone got sick. It’s funny what Bangalore weather does to you!

WB: Dude!

Me: Yeah?

WB: Could you suggest any medicine for sore throat?

Me: You could try Alex or Kofmed…

WB: Ok….

Me: But I usually prefer this gargle called Betadine…

WB: So what do you do?

Me: You just gargle with it, twice a day till your soreness vanishes!

WB: Do you have to swallow it?

Me: Errrrr…..

Lady Boss: It’s called a gargle for a reason!

WB: Ok..Ok! I was just clarifying

Lady Boss: It’s spit not swallow!

WB: I got that!

Me: That’s an awesome pick up line!

Lady Boss: What is?

Me: Spit or swallow!

Lady Boss: How?

Me: Hey baby, do you spit or you swallow?

Lady Boss: Oh god why?

Me: 😀