*Chilling at home with my brother*
Him: So what plans on Holi?
Me: Nothing really. The usual. Make bhang, then drink it and play Holi.
Him: The entire day?
Me: No, only in the evening.
Him: And the rest of the day?
Me: I’ve office.
Him: We have office on Holi?
Him: Since when?
Me: Since always!
Him: What? Holi isn’t a national holiday?
Him: What! My entire life has been a lie!
Me: Not like you celebrate Holi!
Him: This is bullshit! Just pure bullshit! No holiday on Holi!
Here’s what really happened:
DMM and I were scrolling through some posts on 9Gag.
Me: Man, babies are like little drunk people!
DMM: Yeah, man!
Me: Ha! Look at this kid!
DMM: Hahah! But you know…
Me: Know what?
DMM: Not many people like babies.
Me: What are you saying? Everyone likes babies! Or atleast till they learn to talk.
DMM: No, seriously! People don’t like babies at all!
Me: Then how’d you explain India’s massive population?
DMM: Well, I guess people develop a taste for it!
Me: Like, really? Develop a taste for babies or f***ing?
DMM: Both, I guess?
Yesterday, I got this forward from a friend. The points mentioned in them were quite interesting, and I thought that we’ve all done one or more of these things.
I thought I’ll share this with my readers.
Things That Make Us Indian
- When the shampoo bottle seems to be over, I pour some water in it, shake it, and use it for another bath.
- That for me a toothpaste isn’t over until I’ve entirely flattened it out and started rolling it up from the back.
- That I buy broccoli and avocados for 300 Rupees, but still ask for some dhaniya patta for free.
- That I don’t just recycle gifts, I recycle the gift-wrapping paper too.
- Our home has fine bone china crockery which is used only when guests visit.
- That I worry about price of gold without any reason of buying it!
- That I will beat the crap out of my remote to make it work but not change the battery
- I get so disappointed if the Panipuri guy doesn’t give a free sukha puri in the end when I ask for one.
- That I won’t have my breakfast and starve myself if I have been invited for a lunch buffet.
- That when my T-shirt gets old, I use it as night wear, when it gets older, I play Holi in it and then I use it as a pochha.
- That I ask for extra oregano and chili flakes from the Dominos guy, so that I can use them later in Maggi.
I thought this was pretty accurate.
Lets have a fun game, you don’t you all vote for what you’ve done from this list? Also, if you have other lists, do mention them in the comments.