Love Hurts…No..Love Bites!

About two years back, I had gone to Gokarna with my (now ex) girlfriend and her best friend. Since it was only the three of us, we decided to share a room. Before any of you can go *bow-chicka-bow-wow*, let me clarify – Nothing happened.

Anyways, on the journey back, the seats on our bus were riddled with bed bugs and by the time we got back to Bangalore, all our exposed areas ( mostly arms and back) were covered with nasty bed bug bites.

I wore a half sleeve shirt to my office that day.

*My colleague, JD walks upto me*

JD: So dude, I heard that you went to Gokarna with two hotties! Is that true?

Me: Yeah. That’s true!

JD: That’s sexy dude! So f***ing sexy! 

Me: Hahaha… Relax…..

JD: So did you get any? Let me guess, you had a threesome! Right?

Me: No man…. Nothing happened.

JD: Did you share a bed?

Me: Yeah, the bed was big.

JD: Man, I knew it! You player!!

Me: Dude! Believe me! Nothing happened!

*He looks at my bed bug bites*

JD: Oh..My..God! Look at those hickeys! 

Me: Huh? What?

JD: How do you explain those hickeys!

Me: Dude! These are bug bites man! Bed bugs! The bus was full of them!

JD: No way man! No way! 

Me: Oh lord! Why is it so hard for you to believe that nothing happened? 

JD: You went to Gokarna with two hotties, you shared a bed with two hotties and you come back with hickeys to prove that you got some action. Man, you’re a poon hound man!

Me: Dude! These are not hickeys! These are bug bites!

JD: I wasn’t born yesterday, you know… I know a hickey when I see one.

Me: Well, these are hickeys, why would they be on my arms? My frigging arms! It would be on my neck or something!

JD: I dunno… Maybe those hotties had some crazy fetish?

Me: Well, no. And if you think these are hickeys, I have no idea to which whore house you’ve been to, because these are not HICKEYS!

JD: Hahaha… Nice try, you stud! 😉



PS: Nothing happened!