*Chilling at home with my brother*
Him: So what plans on Holi?
Me: Nothing really. The usual. Make bhang, then drink it and play Holi.
Him: The entire day?
Me: No, only in the evening.
Him: And the rest of the day?
Me: I’ve office.
Him: We have office on Holi?
Him: Since when?
Me: Since always!
Him: What? Holi isn’t a national holiday?
Him: What! My entire life has been a lie!
Me: Not like you celebrate Holi!
Him: This is bullshit! Just pure bullshit! No holiday on Holi!
Here’s what really happened:
All of us from office had gone partying on a Friday night after work. By the end of the night, DJ was smashed drunk. Thankfully, he lived walking distance from that club.
*Perks of living in Indiranagar*
*DJ starts to head home*
*Couldn’t even walk staright*
Me: Do you need a lift?
DJ: No…. I’m good!
Me: You can’t even walk straight!
DJ: So? You can’t arrest me for that!
Me: Fair enough…
DJ: Alright, bye then!
Me: Text me when you reach!
Me: Why not?
DJ: We aren’t sleeping together, ok? So there’s no need to text! Ok?
Me: Ummmm… Alright… But still, text me. Ok?
DJ: If we ain’t f***ing, I ain’t texting!
Me: Oh, god….
DJ: Yeah… That’s why!
Yes, DJ reached home safely that night and survived to drink another day!
*Overheard in office*
Guy 1: Which loo do you use?
Guy 2: As in?
Guy 1: As in, the one in the right corner of the office or the one in the left corner?
Guy 2: I dunno!
Guy 1: What you mean you dunno?
Guy 2: I have issues with both the loos.
Guy 1: Like?
Guy 2: The first one, the flush is so strong that it splashes on my pants!
Guy 1: Yeah! That happened to me too! Plus they had put that Harpic blue thingy and the water was all blue. All of that splashed on my pant and that left a blue stain!
Guy 2: Damn!
Guy 1: Yeah…
Guy 2: The second one, the pressure is too less! I don’t feel confident while flushing. Need to flush a couple of time before things completely disappear!
Guy 1: Yeah man! What to do?
Guy 2: Complain to the Office Manager, I guess?
Guy 1: Yeah… That only…