The Pick Up Artist!

Some things I learn the hard way. This was one of them.

Location: Upmarket Club

Scene: I was chatting up a cute chick.

Me: So tell me about yourself!

Chick: I’m an analyst at this investment bank! You?

Me: I’m a manager at this firm! Where are you from?

Chick: Guwahati, Assam. 

Me: Oh cool! You know, I know a little bit of Assamese!

Chick: Show me!

Me: Aye kela! Ki koriasa?! 

*Loosely translated ‘Wassup up d*ckhead?*

*I swear to God, I did not know! That’s how my Assamese friends greet each other!*

*Anyhow, while I was there waiting for her to be impressed*

Chick: Errrrr….

Me: So? What do you think?

Chick: Ummmm… You just called m a d*ck!

Me: Whoa! No way! Sorry! I didn’t mean that! I honestly thought that it meant “Wassup?”

Chick: Yeah….Sure…..I’m gonna go now…..

Me: #FML!

 

poker face

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