On my birthday,
I treat I’m forced to treat my friends. The difference being, instead of taking them out to a pub, I get to call them home and treat them to delicious home cooked meal. My mom is a great f***ing awesome cook. And my friends love her cooking as well.
On one such occasion.
Me: Ma, I need to treat my friends for my birthday.
Mom: Alright, no problem. But you need to do all the shopping.
Me: Sure. I’ll take take of that.
Mom: So, who are all coming?
Me: The usual gang, plus MS and CG.
Mom: Alright. What dishes do you want me to make.
Me: Same thing that you make every year. Biriyani, mutton, chicken, prawn and fish fry.
Mom: Phew, that’s a relief!
Me: And paneer and gobi (cauliflower) for CG and MS.
Mom: Why especially for them?
Me: Because they are vegetarians..
Mom: Omg, now I have to cook for them too. Extra work for me.
Me: Big deal. It’s just two dishes.
Mom: No. I’ll have to make dal and something dry as well. It’s not like they can eat the……. Oh wait, now I have make veg pulao for them too!
Me: Or just plain rice?
Mom: Nah, that won’t look good… You know that, don’t call them. Simple.
Me: Hahahahaha! Right!
Mom: I’m serious…
*Later that week*
CG: Hey! When’s your birthday treat?
Me: Ummmmm…. Not happening..
CG Why not?!
Me: Logistical issues.
CG: Like what?
Me: My mom doesn’t wanna cook vegetarian food, so…..
CG: Say what? No vegetarian food? This is OUTRAGEOUS!
CG: VIVA LA REVOLUTION!
Photo courtesy: Micheal Murphy.