Today is 9th of March. I’m writing a new blog after almost a month. I needed some time to recharge my batteries, evaluate my life and other hi-funda shiz. Also, a lot people have been complaining that:
1) My blog is isn’t funny anymore.
2) My writing sucks b*lls.
3) I really don’t remember this point, but I distinctly remember being a third complain.
Not to sound arrogant or anything, but my life can’t be funny just to entertain you all. Plus I have my moments of absolute mindf*** which leads to extended period of depression-ish state. Also, I do agree that my writing is not top notch, but I do earnestly try to improve myself continuously.
Now that a rant is out of the way, let me tell you a story.
I prefer house parties. You can drink as much as you like and crash whenever you want to. You can dance and sing and save a lot of money. House parties with my friends are usually alcohol fueled and are absolute madness. During one of these house parties, I met a really nice chick. It was one of those crush-at-first-sight kinda thing. She was gorgeous, fun, spontaneous, I can go on and on about how awesome she is. Anyhow, we bonded well, drank a lot, indulged in a lot of chutiyapanti where she started throwing drinks at me (which was annoying) and she then slipped and fell because of the wet floor (karma is a bitch). Anyways, we had fun.
At around 3 am, someone said, “lets go to Nandi Hills to watch the sunrise”. Everyone (the bunch of us who were awake) agreed and we started sobering up. I had parked my car a bit away from the apartment gate, so I went down early to get the car to the gate. Chick also followed me to the car. We entered the car, drove back the apartment and parked the car in front of the gate. As soon as we were done parking the car, there was a loud knock on the window. I looked up, it was a cop who was patrolling the area with another cop.
Cop: Roll the window down!
Me: Yes, sir?
Cop: Where are you going at this time of the night?
Me: Nowhere sir, I live here (pointing at the apartment) and I was just parking my car.
Cop: You have been drinking, haven’t you?
*This is what happens when people throw whiskey on you*
Me: Not much, sir.
Cop: I can smell alcohol on your breath!
Me: All I had was a couple of glasses of wine.
Other Cop: Open the car door.
*The other cop starts searching my car for whatever he was searching*
*I was starting to get annoyed*
Cop: What is this? Drinking and driving?
Me: No sir, I wasn’t driving, I was just parking it here from there.
Cop: Ladies in the car are also drinking! What is this?
*By this this I got really annoyed and I started to raise my voice*
Me: Sir, I’ve told you this before, we were just parking the car.
Cop: It is so late in the night, what are doing with a girl so late?
*I almost blew my fuse, then I remembered an incident which came in the paper a few weeks ago about how the police beat up a couple in the middle of the night because they were talking outside on the road. They weren’t native of Bangalore. The cops were targeting people from North India specifically*
*So I kept my calm*
Me: We’re just heading home, sir.
Cop: The ladies are drinking in the car! What is this?
Me: THERE IS NO ONE DRINKING IN THE CAR, ALRIGHT? THERE IS NO ALCOHOL IN THE CAR!
*I was cheesed off because the cop was trying to frame some charges on me*
Other Cop: Lower your voice!
Cop: Where do you stay huh? Where’s your landlord?
*I pointed at my friends apatment*
Me: I stay here and so does my landlord.
*I was determined not to pay a bribe*
Cop: You people are creating public nuisance!
*Before I could say anything, the entire gang was down*
*Seeing that there was around 15 of us, the cops decided to back off*
Cop: Let this be a warning to you, don’t drink and drive.
Me: Yeah, whatever…
Everyone: Hey, what happened?
Me: Nothing much, the cops were just generally trying to screw with us and get some money.
Everyone: Everything fine?
Me: Yeah, let’s head to Nandi Hills now.
*I got back to my car started the engine*
Chick: Man, that cop scene was scary.
Me: I know, right?
*She then pulls out a bottle of beer from under the seat and take a swig from it*
Chick: You want a sip?
Me: What! You had a bottle of beer with you all this while?
Chick: Yeah…. Did you think that the cops saw it?
Me: Ofcourse they did! That’s why whole commotion.
Chick: Oh crap…
Me: Thank god I didn’t see the bottle! I was angry when they started to tell me that you were drinking in the car!
Chick: Well, thank god they didn’t check the car right?
PS: That was one epic night.